my life.

MONDAY - get up at 7 after 3 hours sleep and 45 minutes of fighting with the snooze button. feeling fucking terrible but excited to see the kids again and waking up in the AM for the first time since thursday. grab a burrito at mad mex and go home thinking about how i would probably still in bed if i didn't have school, take a quick nap (for a few hours), wake up around 9pm and stay up until 2am planning lessons or sitting around not being able to sleep. i still feel good today because i woke up early and had a productive day.

TUESDAY - wake up at 7.15, rush to get to sleep while falling asleep on the train. teach (concentrating mostly on trying not to fall asleep), go to staff meeting (and actually fall asleep), get home around 6.30 and eat, take a nap, stay up chatting, watching movies or listening to music because i know i can sleep in the next day. feeling good, but kind of bad because i know i won't wake up early the next day.

WEDNESDAY - wake up ridiculously late (1pm/2pm), go to some kind of alcohol training for jwow or sit around at home doing fuck all. feeling bad that i've wasted the whole day, go to uni from 4.15-7.15. come home, eat, sit around doing nothing until around 1am when i realize i have readings etc. then complain how i have to stay up late all the time and how busy i am with uni work. go to bed around 4am.


THURSDAY- alarm is set for 8.15 to attempt to get to 9am class (i have only been to about 3 this whole semester). late for class that starts at 10am feeling hungry because i haven't eaten, i crap on about the readings i read early that morning before bed. sit though boring classes until 4.15pm then go straight home and relax for a bit before next. feeling lazy and not wanting to go out, get to next around 1am, party until around 4. i've usually had too much to drink by then and craving a souvlaki. bad choice.


FRIDAY - wake up at 11.30 feeling like horse shit and smelling like souvlaki. regretting drinking so much and feeling terrible that i am lazy and unfit and wasting my day, rush to uni to sit through 2 hours of hell. promise myself i won't drink again tonight. finish uni at 2, go home and get ready for work. go to work and "work" aka drink my sorrows away until closing time (if i haven't passed out by then or sent home).


SATURDAY - wake up in the afternoon on saturday and feel terrible about life again. swear to myself that i definitely will have a QUIET NIGHT tonight. sit around at home until i have to go out and eat. get food, get ready to go out and head to bang. "quiet night" turns into big night... again. get home around 5am.

SUNDAY - wake up at 10am, feel sick in the stomach from too much drinking. feel regret from night before, drift in and out of sleep until 6pm. get out of bed, get food and stay awake until 4am "planning lessons" (watching movies and chatting to friends). feel so much regret that i have just wasted the weekend doing nothing but drink, eat and sleep when i should've been getting up early exercising or getting some uni work done or catching up with people... or something.

repeat.


what the fuck has my life become?